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Speed Dating – An Alternate to the Normal Dating Scene

Tuesday, March 23rd, 2010

What is an Online Dating Service?

Speedating was developed in the early 2000′s as a smarter more effective way to lasting love. According to Yaacov and Sue Deyo in their book Speed Dating the Smarter, Faster Way to Lasting Love, the trend started when Yaacov wrote to his students about making dating more appealing. As a Rabbi, he was concerned about intermarriage weakening the Jewish community. These actions eventually this led to a meeting and several speedating events emerged in the Los Angeles area. Eventually this spread to 25 major cities.

Shortly thereafter many organizations developed their own versions of Speedating and it existed among all faiths. Eventually Yaacov’s Speedating organization took a backseat to the actual events. However, they became more involved in good dating etiquette and other advice into maximizing the most out of your relationships.

Getting back to the Speedating events themselves, there are many pluses in the experience. First of all, the participant gets the opportunity to have one on one face time with a select number of potential suitors over a period of let’s say 3 to 9 minutes each. In the designated time both parties ask each other questions and try to sense if there is some compatibility. Often 4-8 minutes is a good amount of time to get to know someone. In the bar scene especially with loud music playing and a large room full of people, it’s very hard to get quality face time. Also, one man by himself is usually not going to approach a lady who is surrounded by two or more of her friends unless he has a great line.

What is an Online Dating Service?

A second plus is that at the midpoint of the event, there is a 10 to 20 minute break, where participants can seek out the other people in the event. They may follow up with someone they just had a conversation with earlier rounds. Or they can meet someone who they may not have a date with. If there are 14 men and women at an event and only eight maybe nine rounds, there are five or six potential dates that each participant may not get a formal conversation. During this time, some of the early butterflies and nerves that are stirring in many participants will have subsided and people will usually open up more.

The third plus is that the event usually takes in place in a nice restaurant that offers complimentary appetizers. The perk for the restaurant is to try to attract new diners. So they provide samples of their food and sometimes even add drink specials. Other restaurants give away coupons to the daters and in some cases the venue gives out a dinner for two. If the restaurant has the right charm, this is an extra bonus to the singles that are looking for love.

A fourth and fifth advantage is confidentiality and results. The participants are given name tags which has each person’s first name and a number instead of their last. The organizer announces that this is to protect everyone each participant against being stalked or receiving a surprise phone call especially when one party is not interested and the other party just is not getting it. Each participant also receives a dating card to take notes on each eight minute date. At the end of the evening each participant logs in their matches into the website where they registered. From my experience in organizing and participating in events about 60% of the people attending match up with someone. Several participants have had two or more matches. At that point last names are given out as well as phone numbers and emails. Then it’s up to the speed daters to act.